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Show #196: My guest on the show is Tinzley Bradfored, Author of “The Settle Free Dating Method for Women”
How to Tell Him You’re Not Ready to Have Sex
On this week’s show, I welcome back Tinzley Bradford, the author of The Settle-Free Dating Guide for Women. Her no-nonsense guide provides tips for women to unlock all that love has to offer, empowering women to begin making decisions that will help them take control of their dating lives and not settle for anything less than what they deserve.
This week, Tinzley and I discuss a topic that we both get asked about often: how to tell a man you’re not ready for sex. At some point in any relationship, the topic is bound to come up!
The First Tip: Just Tell Him!
Tinzley’s first tip on how to tell a man you’re not ready for sex is simple: just tell him! Whether your desire to wait is for religious reasons or you’ve noticed an emotional change in previous relationships after you’ve had sex, let your man know matter-of-factly that you want to take things slowly. Assure him that your desire to not have sex has nothing to do with your attraction toward him – you’re just waiting to see if you both have that special chemistry.
The Second Tip: Avoid Temptation
The second tip on telling a man you’re not ready for sex is to not set yourself up for temptation. If he asks you to spend the night at his place or asks to stay the night at yours, just decline. Don’t put yourself in a position that leaves you unable to resist the temptation of being alone in the bedroom together – stick to your reasons and remind yourself of their importance to you.
The Third Tip: Let Him Know Early
Are you still in the beginning stages of dating a man? Get your message across early! Tinzley’s final tip on how to tell a man you’re not ready to have sex is to let him know during the “talking” phase of your relationship. Early on, you’ll be able to distinguish between men that are actually interested in a deeper romantic connection and men that are just looking for a sexual partner. Don’t be upset if he cancels the next date – move on and keep searching for the man that will respect your wishes and boundaries.
When Should I Have Sex with Him?
Often, the topic of waiting to take a relationship to that next level is accompanied by just the opposite: at what point should you have sex with a man? Tinzley urges women to do what works best for them and their unique situation. Whether it’s abiding by Steve Harvey’s 90-day rule or just going with the flow, do what feels right and natural. Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated into having sex with anybody – stay true to yourself and take the relationship to next level when you feel ready.
About the Guest
Over the years, Tinzley found herself in a seemingly endless state of dissatisfaction with men. Inspired by a desire to end the willingness she felt to allow men to not fulfill her and her needs, she wrote her book to empower other women to make wiser choices when it comes to men and their dating lives.
If you want to know the secrets on where to meet men, then check out my eBook, “The Secrets to Meeting Men!” – Find out how to meet men!